revafisheye

Open letter to young men who bathe in Axe or Tag or any other manfume/ Confidential to the young man who sat next to me on the PATH this morning

You are adorable in your homeboy hip-hopness: your ubitquitous baggy jeans, oversized baseball cap with the sticker on the brim, loose-fitting racing jacket, bright yellow walkie-talkie style phone. You smiled at Snack and held out your hand for him to smell it. But that gesture, while sweet, was unnecessary. We both, and everyone on the train, smelled you before you boarded. How delightful for us that you chose the seat next to Snack.

I can tell by your face you are a nice kid. You are polite to your elders, help your younger siblings with their homework, and you like animals. That right there is a mark of a good person. It is with the sincerest desire to help you that I share this information with you.

No amount of body spray covers up the smell of ass. It may mask it for a moment, but when the smeller has recovered from the asthmatic irritation of your entrance, the undertone of ass remains. As Natalie Dee advocates, when you wash, wash the butt too. Once clean, there is no need to bathe again in manfume. Don't believe the marketing. That shit is like bug repellent, but instead it repels chicks. And dogs.

Yours truly and sincerely,
revafisheye

posted by revafisheye @ 4:40 PM